The Brag

Ron White
Work Hard Laugh Hard
By Roslyn Helper

Ron White, the cigar-smoking, scotch-drinking Texan with a rough voice and a rougher sense of humour, has worked his way to the top of the comedy food chain, a long way away from where he started 26 years ago. “At one point I was doing a lot of work for one chain of comedy clubs, and they realised I didn’t have anywhere else to work, so they decided to cut my pay by a third and take away my airfare,” he recalls. “So basically I told them to go eat a steaming bowl of fuck.”
White promptly moved to Mexico with his then-girlfriend, and opened a pottery mosaic factory. “But then this thing called the Blue Collar Comedy Tour happened, which is what made me really popular, and they couldn’t tolerate me living in Mexico. So they said, ‘You have to move back to the US if you want to do this.’”

Born in a tiny dirt-road town called Fritch, in Northern Texas, White says his first experience of comedy was an old Andy Griffiths comedy record his parents had, called What It Was, Was Football. “I used to listen to it all the time as a kid,” he says. “I used to like to listen to people laugh on the album, and because that album was always playing, somebody bought me a Bob Newhart album, and then I just started collecting them and I would buy anything that came out. They all had an influence on me.”

White struggled through school, and says he was a wreck before he started doing comedy. “I was an odd kid; I had learning disabilities and I couldn’t perform in school like most kids can, so I probably had a fairly low opinion of myself. I didn’t graduate from high school – but it turns out I’m smart. You just can’t prove it on paper.”

It wasn’t until he was admitted to a drug rehabilitation program, as part of his parole, that White found his calling as a stand up comic. “I ended up going to work for them, being their primary public speaker. So I would go around to high schools and tell the story of my life (which was a big mess at the time), and I could make them laugh. It was just so much fun and nobody else could do it. And it just got funnier and funnier – until the principals of the schools started complaining that it was too funny.”

He has since channeled his addictive personality into a formidable work ethic, doing shows in 140 cities last year alone. “I work really hard. Usually 3-4 cities a week, and I’m moving every day. I have room in my show where I work on new stuff, I never take a break from writing – you really can’t do that. I mean I’ve always got little ideas I’m always trying to work out, and when I’m in LA I go to three to four comedy clubs a night, just doing ten minute sets, just working on new stuff, just like everybody else.”

Work hard, play hard – it seems to be the Ron White way. And at 55, he shows no signs of slowing down. “I still party pretty hard,” he admits, “but it’s all good. I got arrested for pot a couple years ago in Florida, but it helps all my [popularity] when something like that happens. I went to jail and was just really nice to the cops. I had two sold-out shows of people waiting for me and I knew that if I was nice they’d process me quick. Afterwards I sent them a bunch of pizzas.”

What: Ron White – the Moral Compass Tour
Where: Metro Theatre